July 5th, 2006

Quake in your shoes son,

Shake in your boots,

Piss yourself once or twice,

This is life,

Not what you expected,

Not at all what you thought,

And what were you thinking?

Break it down,

One life, one wife,

One way to be,

One boy, and then another,

What a joy to see,

One house for all to live,

One man with all to give,

Take it, and take it, and leave me nothing,

Lose yourself, lose your soul,

Lose your mind,

Make your hole,

Dive in,

Dive in,

The water is fine,

Black and cold, dignity sold,

By the minute, growing old,

Look at my eyes, look inside,

That fear that lingers,

My only prize,

Some bags you also left behind,

From nights and nights of sleepless eyes,

What you see is hardly real,

With half a heart I still appeal,

Witness, watch me,

Pure chaos,

Catch me,

Swirling doom is what awaits,

Awake, awake,

All is done for their sake,

Awake, awake,

I burn in hell of my own make.

And the dream, it comes

Creeping hands slowly reaching,

Slowly up the bed covers,


You don’t belong!

Throat is frozen tight,

I cannot scream, but I still try,

I can feel you still, but I cannot see you there,

And you climb on top,

To smother me, and all I can do is scream,

And scream,

And scream,

No one hears me,

No one ever hears me scream,

Am I awake?

I feel awake, but I cannot move,

And you have your way with me,

Help me, let me go,

Anyone, I am so scared, anyone,

Do you hear me?

Suddenly I come alive,

I move,

I shake in fear and anger, at nothing,

How dare you, how dare you,

And it dawns on me,

The futility of my puny life,

The folly of my self importance,

And just who do you think you are?

One mis-step away from oblivion,

One missed beat, one forgotten breath,

And it will all be over,

A sleep that you know will feel like slippery numbness,

The hands have shown you the terrible end,

And you do not fear the feeling,

You fear the loss.