Love me some salad.

What do you think, when you are walking down the grocery aisle, full of fruits and vegetables, and see, organic?

Oooh, “ORGANIC”!

fresh! unsullied by mans filthy chemicals! farted on by the highest power!

You know what I think?

This delicious salad is about to crunch for all the wrong fucking reasons.

Look people, I don’t enjoy a mouthful of DDT anymore than you do, but when I chop up a head of romaine and I see corpses floating in my oil and vinegar, well, that’s where I have to draw the line.

If I wanted to eat bugs I would ride down to jones beach during high summer full speed with my mouth wide open, kapish?

The earth don’t need no saving you god damn hippy sons of bitches.

I want my fruit pretty and my lettuce pest free.

Thank you.


Live it, Love it, Spray it.

6 replies on “Love me some salad.”

  1. Tobas says:

    meh, as much of a stickler as I can be, slang words don’t merit spelling corrections ms. smartypants.

  2. m says:

    sure they do

  3. Tobas says:

    In the case of “capisce”, I firmly believe that ‘kapish’ conveys proper pronunciation better, as the average reader tends to process the unfamiliar phonetically. still love semantics I see.

  4. m says:

    Na, not nearly as much as I used to. I’m just busting your balls. plus I’m a beast in italian this semester.

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