Monthly Archives: May 2008

If the sun refused to shine.

If the sun refused to shine

When I left you, I left me,
Helpless, futile, naked, raw,
Watching blind, no way to see,
That you would be the death of me,

The sun won’t shine tomorrow,
Black hole rising up instead,
Suck the light right from my sky,
Watch the life fade from my eyes,

The sun won’t rise for me tomorrow,
Black hole rising up instead,

The sun won’t shine no more for me,
All that’s in me out has bled,

I see yellow,
I see red,
I see blackness,
I see dead,

The sun won’t shine until forever,
It refused to heed my call,
Consigned myself to living blind,
With you imprisoned in my mind,

I lost the key,
Can’t let you out,
If I knew how,
I’d do it now,

It swirls so quickly inky blackness,
Trapping lumination whole,
Stared so long at shaded triumph,
Left me there with half a soul,

Let the small incision fester,
Should have closed it long ago,
Night crept in and made a home,
Gently now,
Softly said,
It spoke to me in dulcet tones,
Soothing words meant to remind me,
Likely I will die alone,

The sun won’t rise upon this day,
I called it ’til my throat was hoarse,
Black hole rising up instead,
Rob the dying of comfort bright,
Give us dead eternal night,

One day it may shine again,
Fill this gap the darkness stole,
Until then won’t hold my breath,
Empty shell without a soul.

When.

Did I ever tell you how nice it is when you smile?
Have I ever told you how it tingles when you rub my arm?
Did I ever say how sweet you taste when my lips close on yours?
And have I ever said that you linger, dead skin sticking, smelling sweetly?

All those things I may not say,
But I feel them everyday,

Remember that time you made me soup?
And that note stowed away for my little trip?
What about when you took me to that show,
And captured me speaking incognito, just like I wanted?
I love you for that,

It may seem I take for granted,
All those things that you did,
But I remember, every single one,
And all these things I may not say,

But I feel them everyday,

When I sleep and hug my pillow,
I dream it’s you and I clutch so tight,
When I awake alone again,
Blacker than the blackest night,
It appears to me,
Even in the bright glow of the morning light.

(I had this saved as a draft, I must have written it many, many months ago, and there it sat.  Well here it is then, more words given to the empty air.)

bravery.

At some point drifting along between the shallows and the shoreline a multitude of choices emerge from the foamy wake.  I watched the tide pools fill and drain, little creatures living little, turbulent lives.  I could only wish to be like that hermit crab walking the ever changing path resolutely.

Life is all around in the swirling froth, hanging on the outcroppings. All of them moving in futility.  They only know the courage to keep moving after the unexpected jolt.

I should only hope to emulate such bravery.