To the left…

Ah Beyonce, I do not mean to pick on you my dear, for you are only singing a song that was most likely written by other hands, but you have crystallized something so clearly, that I could not resist.

“You must not know about me
You must not know about me
I could have another you in a minute
matter fact he’ll be here in a minute – baby”


Another you, In a minute.

Imagine that.

I remember, in grade school, the fire marshalls would come in and speak to us of fire safety, and they would drill us, and explain techniques for us to use when there was heavy smoke, or if we went on fire, stop, drop and roll! 

But the one thing I remember most of all, was when they asked us what we should take with us when a fire broke out.  Some answered toys, some their pets, I said perhaps my favorite book lying on the nightstand. 

Wrong.  All wrong.

They explained, as much as those things might seem important, nothing was as important as us getting out, because mommy and daddy could always buy a new toy, or book, or even a new kyle the kitty if need be.  But the one thing they could never buy, was a new you.  You could not be replaced, ever.  A wave of realization swept over our class as we looked around, momentarily of one mind.  Nothing we had, could ever mean as much as we could.

 “I can have another you by tomorrow
So don’t you ever for a second get to thinking you’re irreplaceable”


So, let us fast forward a decade or so, and look at the current state of committed relationships.  I think, should the fire marshalls be called in again, we would find the modern woman carrying out stacks of shoes, several dresses, and perhaps that fine set of china aunt hilda gave them as a wedding gift.  Meanwhile, being very careful to not trip over the prone body of her poor unconcious husband/boyfriend/fiance, as she balanced the precious valuables on her way out the emergency exit.

Perhaps I am being a bit cynical here, and mayhaps a tad bitter once again.  I could be wrong, it could just be that she is speaking about a certain type of male.  Maybe she references the thugged out, pseudo-suave characters that her fanbase enjoys dating and marrying.  The unfolding brim hat wearing, stocking underneath, baggy clothed, spinning neck chain, boo-tay loving, love professing, cat-calling, “ma” loving, multiple baby momma types.  Yes, that could be it.

Or perhaps not. 

“So since I’m not your everything
How about I’ll be nothing
Nothing at all to you
Baby I wont shead a tear for you
I won’t lose a wink of sleep
Cause the truth of the matter is
Replacing you is so easy”

It seems that the fictional “dog” of the song was rolling a different girl around in the “whip”.  Oh yes, this is certainly despicable behavior, but based on that last sentiment, I would have to say that homeslice did himself a favor.  Dropping someone so quickly basically means that they probably did not mean all that much to you in the first place.  You can argue moving on until you are blue in the face, but quite simply, if you truly cared for someone, even if they hurt you so badly, it would be a bitch to lose them. 

But this is the modern attitude.  People have become accessories.  Like gucci bags and blinged out earrings.  You are only as desirable as the next style dictates.  Perseverance is a thing of the past.  You get difficult, make a mistake, or do anything that may be construed as less than desirable, and the answer becomes very simple for todays Beyonce loving modern woman, “to the left, to the left”.  It may just be a foolish song, but art is often a reflection of society, and in this case, I feel it hits the bullseye.

Commitment goes only as far as is convenient.

Why am I picking only on the women here?  Aren’t guys guilty of the same nonsense?

Of course they are!  But since I have a penis, I find myself a bit partial to the male side of things. 


“Everything you own in a box to the left.”

Save yourselves the trouble gentlemen, don’t fucking unpack.


Thank you and goodnight.


4 replies on “To the left…”

  1. blah says:

    I hate to disagree and get your hackles all up and such, but.. Heres what i think:

    Beyonce annoys the hell out of me.. but what shes doing here is important.

    Way too often, women put up with infidelity and the pressure to just “deal with” men and their immature BS.

    You want your woman to stay? Treat her well and be faithful.. otherwise you ARE replaceable and there ARE a million others like you.

    You’re only precious and important as long as you deserve it. The fact that you think someone should put up with you and stay with you regardless of your actions is sad.. and even sadder, typical.

    While this behavior isnt limited to men; women can be cheaters too, this doesnt change the point. If you want to be treated like you matter.. then take the responsibility and do the right things and behave like someone who is worthy of it.

    Otherwise.. you have nothing to complain about, because you made a conscious choice to betray the one you were with and took being with them for granted.

    And while everyone can change.. noone should be made to feel like they HAVE to stay with the betrayer.

    This isnt 1950.. this is 2006.. your opinions seem not only outdated, but defensive. You’re looking for excuses to feel like the victim, and you’re glazing over the fact that you have had things happen to you for a reason.

    Learn from your mistakes and make the necessary changes so that it wont happen again.

    THAT is my point.

  2. Tobas says:

    I agree with your assessment one hundred percent. but…

    It does not change the fact that there is always a scale of judgment, and it is only fair to place a person upon it before ultimately letting the axe fall.

    See, it is not regardless of my actions, but because of them, without making this into a personal tale, I will try and convey the fact that there is good and bad in everyone, and in every relationship, the question lies with whether a person has value enough to survive an error.

    Predictably, you have chosen to address the mistake of cheating, which leads me to believe I may know you rather well.

    Really, my point was not so much about having to stick with a “betrayer”, but really about seeing the value in a person regardless of condition. In other words, it takes a big person to try and understand before resorting to “to the left”. It may be rather cut and dry, as the lyrics seem to portray, but often there are other circumstances that led to such behavior, that are often glossed over in an attempt to “abandon ship”.

    And in the womans case, abandoning ship often means floating away on a barge full of valuables.

    The only thing outdated here is divorce law honey, in this country, every man becomes a victim sooner or later.

    The only thing typical is your belief that people are disposable.

    “Learn from your mistakes and make the necessary changes so that it wont happen again.”

    No point doing that being with a person like you now is there? You wont be there to see it anyway.

  3. Ruthie Rone says:

    everybody think that she’s talkin about sombody’s dick when she sings this song,, but she’s not. She’s talkin about a guys ego ppl. Which is another word for his confidence or watever yu call it. GET ON YOUTUBE AND TYPE IN DEFINITION OF THE SONG? EGO AND YOU WILL SEE BEYONCE IN A WHITE SHIRT EXPLAININ IT!

  4. DELETE ME says:

    Awesome post mang

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